Thursday, November 2, 2017

LuLuRoe: a review for plus sized (really for all) women

Last spring at a clergy gathering, I was admiring several of the outfits the younger clergy women were wearing.  When I asked where they got the outfits, they all said:  LuLuRoe!


For those who have not experienced LuLuRoe yet, it's a line of clothes marketed primarily in home parties.  Of course, it has all the pluses and pitfalls of this marketing strategy:  
  • You have to know someone to buy.
  • If you're invited to a party, there's pressure to buy something even if you don't want to, 
  • There's pressure to host a party yourself.
  • You are limited to purchase what the consultant has in stock (for LuLuRoe at least - other home marketing companies allow the consultant to order specific items).
  • If you purchase on-line (consultants do have on-line stores) there's the issue of not being able to try on the item first. Sometimes the colors look different in the pictures than in real life.  And there's the whole matter of shipping to you and shipping returns.  
Then there's the consultant's side (I learned the following from various reviews of LuLuRoe):
  • Some people are good at this sort of thing and do very well.  
  • Some are not and end up spending a lot of money on inventory they can't move.
  • Consultants order styles and sizes, but can't order particular patterns or colors.  Which means they can't tailor their inventory to the tastes of their clients, and sometimes get stuck with patterns they can't sell
  • If you want to get out of the business, LuLuRoe will not buy back your inventory even at a discount.
Still, I like the idea of supporting women who are running their own businesses.  So I have purchased several outfits. This fall I was invited to an on line party.  And I admit I am hooked.  There are several things I love about these clothes, and several things I don't love.  

Your shopping experience will vary greatly depending on your consultant.  One I have worked with has her on-line store open all the time.  She readily will exchange or refund items if you don't like your purchase. Another consultant I have purchased from only has the on-line store open if there is an on-line party.  And if the size is wrong - you get store credit, not a cash refund.

I've read reviews that say the price point is good, and review that believe the clothes are too expensive.  I find the prices are comparable to Lane Bryant and Torrid (my go-to stores), but there are not the kind of sales you find at LB and Torrid.  Tops are around $35, leggings are $25, dresses are $50-65.  The jackets are a little pricey.

I have tried most of the shirt styles, the leggings (LOVE), most of the dress styles, most of the jacket styles and one of the skirt styles.  Here is my opinion of the clothes I have tried:

What I like: 
  • They are super comfortable.  I wore a Carly dress and leggings to a women's meeting and I admit - it really did feel like I was in my comfy lounging around the house clothes!
  • The leggings are buttery soft.  The shirts and dresses are not as soft, but still really, really comfortable.
  • The necklines are reasonably modest.  I have been having issues with much of the clothes marketed to plus size women at stores like LB and Torrid.  The necklines are plunging and the whole "cold shoulder" thing?  It's pretty hard to find work appropriate clothing!
  • The fabric is fairly sturdy.  Again, many of my purchases from LB and Torrid have been sheer or paper thin.  And of course they just don't hold up.  I haven't had my LuLuRoe very long, but the material is much thicker and I think it will hold up well - as long as you wash it correctly.
    • FYI - The washing instructions for everything is wash in cold on a delicate cycle and hang dry.  This works for me, since I wash everything in cold, and hang dry all of my shirts and dresses. But you might consider it a minus, if you just toss everything in the dryer.  

What I don't like:
  • The sizing is not consistent across sizes.  A 2x in an Irma top is much larger than a 2X in a Classic T.  A 3x in a Amelia or Nicole is smaller than a 2x in a Carly.  And I wear an Large in a Lindsey.  Which means you really need to try everything on.
    • My recommendation:  Go to a pop up store or a in-person party and try everything on.  Write down your sizes in each style you like, so if you later see something on-line you like, you'll know if it will most likely fit.
  • Different materials also make the sizing inconsistent.  I know that's an issue for all women's clothing.  My husband thinks I'm crazy for trying on the exact same shirt in white, black and the cool pattern I like - but I have found that even in the best retail stores, the size can be vary radically between colors and fabrics.
    • Some consultants in their on-line stores will note what fabric an item is made from.  And some don't.  I tend to stay away from the jacquard - they tend to run small and are not very stretchy.  Which means, if the consultant doesn't list the fabric, I have to contact her before buying - and rely on her judgment as to if it will fit me.
  • The sizing runs small - really small.  It might say its a 3x and will fit a 24-26, but don't believe it.  I have found that most of the 2x (which is what I typically wear) are too small, and the many of the 3x sizes are too small as well. Especially if you are a - ahem - well endowed woman.  
    • The consultants will encourage you to wear something that fits tighter than you are comfortable with.
    • Most of the fabrics are pretty clingy.  
  • What's up with the black leggings?  They are the unicorns of LuLuRoe.  I know one consultant that hold them back for special promotions, or will allow you to purchase them if you buy a dress.  And they are almost impossible to get in the TC2 (size 20 and up).  The other legging patterns are sometimes cute, but there is a limit to how many wildly patterned leggings a grown woman needs!
  • The same goes for solid colors - they seem to be few and far between,  I know some of the fun is pattern mixing, but again there are only so many of these "fun" outfits an adult needs in her wardrobe!
    • On the other hand, the kids and teen patterns are so stinking cute, it makes me wish I had grandchildren to buy for!
  • The selection of colors and patterns:  since consultants can only order styles and sizes, there is no telling what colors and patterns they will get in each order.  And the company limits the number of items produced in a particular pattern/color.  This means:
    • It's not as likely that you will see someone wearing the exact same outfit as you as if you bought it from a mass retailer - a plus IMHO.
    • But if you see something you really like, you need to buy it NOW.  I don't like this - I think it promotes impulsive spending,  It's really hard to see that cute color/pattern in your size and the style you love and  know that if you don't get it now, it may be gone when it's in your budget.  My usual on-line shopping habit is when I find something I like, I wait to purchase it for a few days (or longer).  If I still want it and it's in my budget, then I purchase.  This helps me avoid most impulse buys, and LuLuRoe's marketing strategy seems expressly designed to counteract it!
    • The consultants will tell you to shop the pattern - they are always saying how they can wear multiple sizes in a style and it works if you just do such-and-such (like wear a belt, or tie it, or pin it in a certain way).  I have found that this really doesn't work for me, as most of the sizes are too small.  
  • IMHO, the cutest colors/patterns are in the standard sizes.  Especially for the tops and the leggings.  I am pretty sensitive to 'fat lady' patterns and patterns that look like my grandmother would wear (and I'm old enough to be a grandmother myself so if I think my grandmother would wear that pattern, you know it's pretty bad!) and these type of patterns seem to be the go-to for the plus sizes.  Which means if I do see something cute in my size, I feel like I better jump on it now (see the comment above about impulsive spending).
  • IMHO leggings are not pants.  There may be some women who can pull off leggings and a shirt for casual wear, but I am not one of them.  The tops are too short for me to be comfortable appearing in public wearing them with the leggings - even the Irma, which is billed as a tunic.  (it's not - it's just a long top).
  • The cut of most items are flowing - which means not very structured.  This can lead to a frumpy outfit, if it is not accessorized with a belt or a structured jacket.  You have to be pretty intentional about what you buy and how you wear it to avoid the frump factor.

Yes, there are more things I don't like than I do, but I'll still buy LuLuRoe,  For me, the comfort and quality of fabric, and the modest cuts outweigh the minuses.  I have developed a strategy for my purchases:
  • Know your sizes and what styles you like and don't like.
  • Ask what fabric an item is make from, and if it is a tighter fabric don't buy it no matter how cute it is.
  • Ask the consultant what her return policy is before buying.  The consultant I mentioned above that only offers store credit?  I only purchase what I can try on first (except for the 2 styles that I can wear regardless of the fabric).  
  • Don't be pressured to pattern mix if you are not comfortable with it.  Think about the pattern and what you will wear it with. 
  • Don't give in to pressure to "shop the pattern."  Stick to the sizes that fit you.
  • Don't buy leggings to go with everything.  You'll end up with a drawer full of leggings that you won't wear.  I know it's tempting - they are so comfortable!  
  • Mix and match LuLuRoe pieces with other items in your wardrobe.  
  • Go for the solids and smaller patterns.  Save the bold patterns for 'fun' outfits.
  • Keep in mind how the piece you are buying will fit in your wardrobe.  Is it a lounge-around-the-house piece?  Something you will wear for work?  Do you have a jacket or belt, etc that will go with it? Make sure you are spending your hard-earned money on a piece that will give you lasting value.
  • Above all - make sure you LOVE the piece you are buying.  
I hope this helps guide you through the craze that is LuLuRoe.  

Sunday, August 20, 2017

Courage in the Face of Evil: a Zookeeper, his Wife and Charlottesville

This sermon is part of a Summer at the Movies Series and refers to the movie 'The Zookeeper's Wife" Scripture readings for this Sunday are Esther 4:9-14, Psalm 64, Romans 12:1-8 and Matthew 25:31-45

Jan and Antonina Zabinski owned a zoo

That’s an unlikely beginning for a story of courage and heroism

But God uses the most unlikely people to accomplish surprising things

Jan and Antonina ran a zoo
In Warsaw, Poland
In the 1930’s  and 40’s

If you remember your history, you will remember that when the Nazis occupied Warsaw, they first bombed the city.  The zoo was devastated, animals were killed.  Some animals escaped and were rounded up and returned to the zoo.

Jan and Antonina began again, caring for the animals.  But the Nazis decided the remaining animals had to be killed.  The food and resources that would keep these animals alive in winter were needed for the German war effort.  

The Nazis determined to close the zoo, dismantling it to provide war resources.

But Jan and Antonina had a plan.  You see, the Nazis were also busy dismantling the lives of the Jews in Warsaw.  First it was little things - an armband, a curfew, shops closing, restrictions on travel.  

Now Jan and Antonina's Jewish friends were being rounded up into one horrific ghetto - little food, little water, no wood for fire, large families crowded into one room.

Jan and Antonina had a plan.  A dangerous plan.  Inviting just a Jewish couple to hid in their house at a time when even offering a Jew a glass of water could get them shot was a huge risk for them and their young son.  But they did, asking a couple who they were friends with to move in and hide. The woman accepted, but the man declined as he was too well known in the community.

As things got progressively worse for the Jews, Jan and Antonina realized that they could  not just help one or two.  They had much more room than that.  They had the underground enclosures for the animals.  They could save more Jews.  

To do this, they needed to save the zoo from destruction.  So they offered to raise pigs in the old - above ground - animal enclosures.   Pigs that would provide meat for the German soldiers.

Jan would go to the ghetto to gather scraps to feed the pigs, smuggling out a few Jews at a time, to hid at the zoo until the resistance could move them out of Warsaw.  A member of the labor bureau allowed him to use Jews for labor at the zoo - Jews who walked out the gate of the ghetto and disappeared, with new identities.  

Antonina would care for their guests.  Since a part of the zoo was being used as a Nazi animal breeding program, she had to make sure her guests were not discovered.  They had a code - if she played a certain song in the day, they were to hide.  Another song at night, and one by one, children, women, and men gathered in the Zabinski living room, spending the night hours in a semblance of normal life sharing wine and food and and each other’s company.

Two simple people - one atheist and one catholic - saved 300 Jews.  

Jan and Antonina’s daughter Teresa, who was born during the occupation, said her parents never considered themselves heroes: 
“My parents told me that they did only what should have been done — it was their obligation to do that. They were just decent people. They said decent people should do the same, nothing else. I’d like as many people as possible to understand what actually happened here in Warsaw during the war, and how much humanity and love can do." (quote from PEOPLE magazine interview)

300 hundred Jews were saved by Antonina and Jan.  I know that seems a drop in a bucket of the approximately 6 milion Jews that were killed (not to mention the 9 million other people the Nazi’s murdered  - mostly civilians).

Two people stood up for what is right.  Stood up against the Nazi war machine.

It’s an inspiring story.  We’ve all heard stories of the heroic deeds of those who resisted the Nazis.  

But what does it mean for us, today, for us personally in the communities we live?

When I first selected this movie and thought about what I would say today, I was going to say “ now you probably will never have to stand up against Nazis. But God has put you here for such a time as this."  

I was going to talk about the courage it takes to see Jesus in the least of these and work to feed the hungry and thirsty, provide shelter for the homeless and clothes for the naked.  To welcome the stranger - refugees. To visit the sick and work for adequate medical care.  To visit the prisoner and demand just humane treatment for those incarcerated.

But then...last weekend I watched videos of young men carrying torches and Nazi flags in the streets of an American city - Charlottesville VA.

I heard the stories from colleagues attending a prayer meeting to pray for peace and unity about how the church was surrounded by these men - these neo-Nazis, shouting and threatening the worshipers inside.  How they couldn’t leave for over 30 minutes and then had to escape out a side door and back streets to safety.

I saw a post from a WWII vet - "I fought the Nazi’s 73 years ago and if I have to I will fight them again!"

So I’m not sure anymore that we won’t be called to stand up against Nazis.

I am sure that we are called to stand up against white supremacy and hatred.

God created all of us - every single person
Every single race, ethnicity
Every single gender and orientation
Every single ability level
No matter who you are
No matter who you meet
God created us all in the image of God.

And if we remember from the Shack - God is especially fond of each one of us.  Jesus loves the little children (and every living human being is child to God) of the world red and yellow black and white. They are precious in his sight.

There are no second class citizens in the kingdom of heaven.  In fact, in the kingdom of heaven we see Jesus in those we would consider the least of these.

So when I hear the story of the sheep and the goats, I get nervous.

I don’t know if we’re going to be called into account - there’s a difference of opinion of what “all the nations” means.  Is it all unbelieving nations, so those who have lived according to God’s way of Love are rewarded for their actions even if they didn't believe?

Or does it include all nations - believing and not - being judged? I hope not - because I know I don’t do a very good job of seeing Jesus in the least of these.  Especially if offering a glass of water means I could get shot!

Especially if talking about racism and white supremacy makes my congregation uncomfortable or offended.

And yet that is exactly what I am called to do.  To stand against hate and call out racism and white supremacy as a sin.

To recognize my own complicity in racism and confess it.  

To work for equality and justice for everyone.

If my sermon today offended you - I’m sorry.  If so I would love to talk more with you.  Call me, we’ll talk.

If I challenged you today - call me, we’ll talk.

If you're sitting there thinking, this sermon doesn't have anything to do with me - PLEASE call me. We need to talk.
Let’s talk -there are great resources from the synod to explore the facets of racism as we learn to love others as God loves us.

And that is exactly what we are called to do.

And I believe we have been placed here for just such a time as this.  To stand up for what is right.  To stand up for the values of the kingdom of heaven.

And I’m going to say it again - in the kingdom of heaven, all are truly equal in God’s sight.  In the kingdom of heaven, all are fed, all are sheltered, all are loved, all are welcomed.

As Christians, baptized into the family of God, filled with God’s spirit and love - this is our calling.  

This is who we are.

Sunday, August 13, 2017

Beauty and the Beast Within: reflections on Charlotteville

We're doing a summer at the movies series and this Sunday's movie is Beauty and the Beast. As I reflect on the events in Charlottesville VA, I can't help but believe the Holy Spirit had a hand in scheduling this particular movie for this week.

What a better way to illustrate the horror of hate? I think particularly of the scene where Gastonia incites the villagers, making up false claims of the acts the Beast will do - such a creature cannot be allowed to live. All the while Belle tries vainly to attest to the humanity of the Beast. Finally the villagers grab torches, make weapons out of what is at hand and rush to kill the Beast.

Sounds all too familiar, doesn't it?

With false claims of the horrors that the Other (PoC, Jews, anything group that is not cis-white-male) will do, ignoring all attestations to the basic, created-in-the-image-of-God, humanity and worthiness of the Other, the alt-right, Neo-Nazis grabbed torches and used whatever weapon was at hand (a car) to subdue the Other. They surrounded a church- a church! - to intimidate those gathered to prepare to counter their message of hate.

Beauty and the Beast. The irony of this story is that the Beast is beautiful inside. And outward beauty often hides the beast within.

Our scripture for this Sunday is 1 Samuel 16:1-13, especially verse 7: the Lord doesn't look at outward appearances, but at the heart.

And Psalm 139:13-18 which proclaims we are all fearfully and wonderfully made by God, who in great wisdom and delight made us each exactly as we are. Male and female. Red, yellow, black, white, brown and all shades in between. Ability, sexual orientation. EVERYONE created by God, in God's image.

We hear Paul's admonition in Romans 12:9-21, encouraging us to follow Jesus' Way of love, and to not be overcome by evil but to overcome evil with good.

We hear Jesus' own words in Luke 6:37-45, telling us not to judge, not to condemn, reminding us that what is in our hearts will be shown by the fruit we produce - or by not producing good fruit at all. He goes on in the next verse to say, So why do you keep calling me Lord, Lord when you don't do what I say? Read all of Luke chapter 6 and you'll find that Jesus tells us to do pretty much the opposite of what the torch-welders in Charlottesville are proclaiming.

Jesus calls us to be the Beauty. Jesus asks us to let him cast out the beast inside, so the we can be filled with the love that flows from the very heart of God. The Heart that is weeping as torches and weapons are brandished. The Heart that loves and delights in the great diversity of creation.

Beauty and the Beast - love will always triumph over the beast.

Friday, January 13, 2017

Word for the Year: Courage

Courage, huh?

This year, our congregation drew starwords.  A starword is a word (written on a star) that reveals God to you:  provides a way to think about how you see God active in your life and in others; a word to focus your prayers around; a word to encourage you or challenge you to live into.

My star word is definitely challenging: courage.  I have a couple of ideas about what that might mean for me this year

I’m starting a new call and I want to correct some bad habits I developed in my last one.  Overwork, not taking time for Sabbath, family, selfcare.  Timidity in my leadership – not preaching against injustice when I know it will make my congregation angry, going with the flow instead of challenging them. I lead like the Cowardly Lion – with a roar the turns into a whimper at the slightest opposition. 

Does it take courage to make sure I’m taking time for myself?  Maybe in my case it does.  After all, I was raised to believe that any thing I wanted or needed was selfish and I had to totally give up self for the good of the family.  In the dynamics of a family led by an alcoholic father, I had to learn to over-function to survive.  This is strange territory, to carve out boundaries, to ask for what I need, to make sure I am taking care of me.  I’ve wandered in this land before, slowly, tenuously venturing further and further past the border until the outskirts of the land of self-care has a well-known path I trod but never venture deeper.  Do I have the courage to forge a new path?

I know it take courage to lead.  I envy my colleagues who take a stand against injustice and look at my own reticence with shame.  I justify it by saying that my congregation is not where theirs is, that mine has not done the early stages of work, that they are just not ready for the steps my colleagues are taking.  While there is truth to that do I use this as an excuse to engage in the hard work of recognition of our complicity in injustice, of reconciliation?  Do I have the courage to “wake” my congregation instead of letting them comfortably snooze?

I have a new start, a new call.  A chance to redefine the kind of pastor I am.  A chance to live into the person God has called me to be.  That would take courage.


It’s a good word for me this year.

If you would like a star word, let me know in the comments and I'll draw one for you.